Some more pain & Little hope!

It doesnt get any better.. Does it? I was hoping today would be a perfectly good start to the life ahead.. it would be the first step of fulfilling our dreams of love success and a beautiful life together.

It feels terrible not getting what you'v worked so hard for and very well knowing that you deserve every bit of it. I dont know what I can do to ease your pain.. I wish there was something I could do. It would'v helped ease the pain & guilt that I am carrying within. I feel really really awful...

I dont want to dwell on these feelings any longer coz I know they dont help. They only make matters worse. But everytime in the past when I'v buried the nonsensical stuff and tried to move ahead it hasn't yielded any results..

Not taking Past as any indicator for the Future...I will move on... I am going to make myself emerge stronger & more determined.. and next time I am sure things will definitely go our way!! Amen!!

(05/01/2010)

It couldn't have been a worse start to the year...
There are certain days that tend to be bad..some really bad...but there are some days that become landmarks in your life, for all the trauma & pain they bring to your life..
Its never easy to handle the bitter truths of your life... and particularly when it is handed over to you by the ones you love and that too in the most hurting manner ever..
I know I've made mistakes and a whole lot of them. I know I've done things I shouldn't have.. I also know that I haven't done things that I really should have. I know every bit of it --- I have regretted it, I have suffered it, I have paid for it & I probably will pay for it the rest of my life.
They may be right in making me realise it, making me suffer all over again through their harsh words. But I really don't have the emotional strength to handle it... Still I have to. I dont have a choice!
But it sure hurts like hell...
Things won't be the same anymore. I know I won't be the same person anymore, for better or for worse. Coz I took it in my stride once but not this time... I am going to embrace your words and let them ring in my ears each day, till the last moment of my life and make sure I do full justice to them.

How to make this year a happier one...

(Article by Jitendra Nagpal)

"To live happy is an inward power of the soul" said Aristotle, the great Greek thinker. We often find it difficult to derive happiness from our everyday life, so full of stress and worries. However, the fact is that happiness lies deep within us, in the very core of our being, not in an external object.

It is, thus, a state of well-being, a balance of physical, psychological, social and spiritual self. A state in which our mind's habitual agitation is calmed.

We tell ourselves ou life will be better when we have a bigger car, when we can take a vacation... The truth is, there is no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, then when? Challenges will always be there. Admit as much and decide to be happy in spite of it all. Here are some simple initiatives you can take.


Focus on personal goals :
Cultivating your spirituality may uncover what is most meaningful in your life. By clarifying what is important to you, you can eliminate stress by focusing less on the unimportant things that can sometimes consume you.
When you feel part of a greater whole, you realise that you are not responsible for everything that happens in life. You can share the burden of tough times as well as the joys of life's blessings with those around you.
Whether you find spirituality in a church, mosque or temple or in your family, or in walks with a friend through nature, this sharing of spiritual expression can help build relationships. Research indicates that people who consider themselves spiritual are often better able to cope with stress and have higher personal goals.

Use Adaptive Thinking :
Realistic thinking involvves reasoning, which helps us adjust to the real world. It also includes the strengths and the weaknesses within one's self and the ability to cope with these.
Our positive th inking can put us on the right path ad change our personality. Thinking, therefore is very important for learning, understanding, shaping external matters or our mind.

Develop Relationships :
Happiness begins with our relationship with ourselves and is nurtured by our ties with others and our sense of purpose in life.The best ways to lutivate happiness are to improve self esteem and to foster closeness with those who are important to us.

Reflect inward :
Create fond memories. Keep a journal to help you express your feelings and record your progress. Seek out a trusted advisor or friend - preferably someone who has had similar life experiencs - who can help you discover what is important to you. Sometimes others have insights that you have not.
Read inspirational stories or essays to help you evaluate different philosophies of life. Talk to people whose happiness you admire. Be open to new experiences. Do something different. If what you are doing is causing you problems, do someething else.
Playing video games getting in the way of relationships? Spending money you do not ear? Identifying a problem is a good first step. Then go and do something else. If you find you cannot do something else, you may be addicted, in which case the something different coud include counselling.
If you cannot specify a problem but still cannot call yourself happy, then use some mental techniques to enjoy life more - develop effectiv elistening and communication skills and stop thinking about things that are bothering you and direct your mind to things you enjoy, and you may find surprise solutions popping up in your head; pray or meditate, whatever makes you feel calmer, stronger; focus on enjoying the present instead of fretting over the future.